He learned quick he's not everyone's favorite person or going to be liked. He got more heat for having an opinion but it ate him up to be silent turn a blind eye. He failed and made mistakes but didn't like others holding guilt over his head. It already burdened him from the inside out.
He knew saying something would get worse but acted out of frustration. Took time to process and cope with things. Somethings he would work on others he disagreed. He didn't care to open up if he didn't trust a person. Everything was made personal felt like an attack for speaking but didn't care to be superior wanting to be an equal but learned he didn't have a place so he was more open mind to change