You were speaking in a different tone
and your words weren't the same.
I could tell the second you answered
and yet you doubt my abilities.
Anger pulses through my blue veins,
longing to find something, anything.
They say that hate requires more energy
than loving someone does,
but darling, how badly I wish it required less.
All day long, I've been smiling more than usual
and singing to myself until you came around.
Positivity does nothing for me when it is
up against the pollution of your love.
I am slamming my fingers on the keyboard
wishing that it was the soft flesh covering
your fragile bones I sometimes love to caress.
I am screaming inside of my mind
and no one, no one is hear to listen but me.
My blood has reached the boiling point
and it's all spilling, spilling, spilling
into bittersweet ambivalence.