my brain is pulsing
my mind tries to escape my skull  
an empty head pounding toxic waste
i remember nothing before the pain
and wonder if there exists an after  

my other me is busy curling up
on the cold tile bathroom floor
while i lie in bed struggling with the pain  
we both know for sure
that somewhere out there i must be happy

we lie in the tub convinced
that if i can just get the water hot enough
to burn away my flesh and
make my muscles forget
i will be cured  

my taps are cursed
and the water pressure is never enough
to force it all back where it came from  
eventually, i will be purged