I have to stop
looking into that mirror
I memorize lines that have never yet crossed my face
I agonize over every detail of what may come and what we may become
it creeps into your mind and it's all you can see at night
when you are wide awake
and it's gnawing away at the only thing that keeps you alive at times like this-
that feeling of adequacy that washes over your bad thoughts like an ocean will wash stones clean and smooth,
she falls in love with every man she cannot help
sometimes there are moments that are simply perfect
but he's interrupting me
he is talking over me
I can smell the alcohol on his breath over the phone he reeks so bad