there's no delicate, politically correct way to say this. as soon as i saw you leaning against the wall of the bp, with your pants halfway down your ***, your wifebeater thrown over your shoulder, your big brimmed hat on crooked, and your white skin pockmarked with needle tracks, i wasn't scared of you, i was disgusted.
my first thought? burned out ******. my second? just please don't say anything to me. my third? ****, he's probably looking at my ****** white girl ***. my fourth? he just opened the door for me.
i think what i said was, "oh! thank you. excuse me." and i think what you said was, "ain't no thang." and i saw on your forearm not needle tracks, but the very same scars that have lined my hips and thighs.
i looked at the sodas, and you pointed out the cheap ones. "my girl drank three sodas an hour before she passed. i guess you could call me a cheapskate, but it's worth it."
i was lost for words, so i just thanked you again. you got in line, asked for the usual. you got your cigarettes. i bought my soda, and turned around to you holding the door. i said, "thank you again." and walked away.
i don't know you. i don't know your life. i don't ever feel bad about making snap judgements. but you radically changed my view of you in two short minutes. if there was any way for you to know, i'd like to say i'm sorry. and thank you...you've inspired me to change.
this might seem like the easy way out, but i can't think of anyone else. day 21 out of a 30 day challenge. very overdue.