Dear God, I really have no one else to talk to. You know. I am alone. I am alone. No one wants me to be sad. They have their own sadness. I need more than a bandaid of offhand epithets. I can't seem to take care of myself like I used to do. And I am guilty of using opportunity to build myself up. I'm losing my beauty. And I'm afraid I'm losing my inner beauty too. All I have now is determination to serve the ones you've given me. And I'm failing them. I'm failing me. I need you to rescue me! I don't know what to do. People tell me to find a hobby. A hobby? My life is not a hobby. My life is a mess. I need help. I don't want to fail. It's all tricks and mirrors these days Convincing others and myself I'm "okay" But I'm far, far away from "okay" I don't know what to do I keep trying to escape from my suffering My escapes are ruining my way out I'm in pain God. Gina used to rescue me and she's hiding. I can't find her She's lost in the tunnel that leads out of this life. If I find her I'm afraid I will die. Will I die? Please don't let me die. There must be a way to find her and bring her back to life. Maybe she just fell asleep? Is she in a coma? What do I do? Her dreams are stuck on the wrong side of the rainbow. And she won't wake up.