The kind of tired that sleep don't fix. Start off on my back, force my eyes closed, listen to my heart race, stare at the ceiling. Flip onto my side and slip my arm under my pillow, and just listen to the wind blow the chimes outside of my window. Maybe lay on my stomach and hug the pillow tight, this feels pretty comfortable, this position might be just right. That's when the smoke detector begins to chirp in the night. I'm running out of time, God please send me to sleep because work is gonna **** if I don't get this relief. Please give me sleep. Please.
Visions of guilt and disappointed faces are floating behind my eyelids. Memories of embarrassment, and past bad decisions, line dance through my skull. I'm feigning sleep while I'm wide awake in my soul.