One day i will not need love anymore. I will not rise to open the door cause that sound i am hearing is all in my heard. You loved him the way fragile kids love candy. You wrote songs and letters about him. You still sleep with his shirt to smell the cologne on it. Anxiety will not let me breathe. Because i was a fool in love.
When i caught you cheating. You made my heart bleed. I attended a nearby funeral procession. I joined mourners there to cry my heart out. Than i realized i never loved you. I felt pity for you and couldn't let you go. You were suicidal and lost everyone close to you. I did not want to see you in that dark place. So i stay to keep watch on you.
It became a devil snare for me. I got trapped in a situation where you always came first. I tolerated your toxic behavior. I had to support your childish trait. Find myself accepting your drunkenness.
I really wanted it to be you. I so badly wanted it to be you that i will walk with the the alter. Until i understood i was never in your plans. I was your cry shoulder in your darkest moments. You had someone to entertain you daily. Until you get bored and came running to me with your problems.
I was never a boyfriend in your eyes. You loved me because i reminded you of your father. So instantly i was a father figure you wanted to uplift you..
I loved you when no else did. I sacrificed my sanity to se you smile. I can't put into words what that did to my heart. I was hurt so deeply that i thought i will never love again.
Now that the dust has passed and settled. I found somebody to help me find myself. Who appreciate and values my love for her. I bought a dress and a wedding ring for you. This person will wear them in your behalf.
I saw that's there's nothing painful like regret. Wondering what could have been. In this love month you are sending me messages for forgiveness. I am preparing a wedding for myself. I can't worry about spilled milk. While i have a platinum in front of my eyes.
Finally i realized that i was never asking for too much. I was with a wrong person to give me affection. You were with me because i was your therapist. I am with someone that love and support me whole heartedly. You gave me a lesson in life.. That don't stay in a relationship because you are afraid of what will happen to another person. Stay in a relationship because you are loved and appreciated. Knowing someone out there is praying for you. I am a living testimony of it. I have found that one whonis os dearest to my heart and soul.