Feeling empty is much different from what people think it is
It feels like the blood had been drained from me
From the tips of my toes, to the top of my head
I feel as if there is a gaping hole in me
A hot air balloon running out of air, with no clue where the hole is to patch

I’ve tried filling the emptiness
But it’s more than a hole of emptiness
It’s a vortex, a black hole
It will take and take but will never be satisfied
Because satisfaction was never the end game for it.

I am a vortex
I want to fill my emptiness
So I drag others and items and anything close to me
Because I keep thinking “This will make me happy, this will satisfy me”
And yet each time, I forget about the item, I hurt the person, and I hurt myself.

I hope someday, I’ll meet another vortex, because maybe two of us will make things better
Or maybe that will just be more destructive
Who knows.

To anyone who I cross paths with:
I’m sorry you must now rebuild the land that is your mind
That you must now reconstruct that thing that was your heart
I will never be able to satisfy your need for my apology
Because the only satisfaction, is for my vortex to end.
I’m not sure how to do that.