Not sure how I feel about letting this out to the masses.
I could just bury this and not have to put myself in this predicament.
The more I hold it in, the more I endanger my mental health.
But, I don't know how to  feel about it.

I haven't really written in a long time,
I don't know if this is the correct way in which I can express myself.
Let alone know how to express.

I find myself in situations whereby I wish that I didn't have to cross a specific point.
I find myself heavily tired of being emotionally and mentally drained by my life just so I can learn and be stronger.
I find the process of life heavily tiring.

I'm probably coming off as suicidal.
I apologise to anyone that I trigger
It's just if  I don't voice it out, I might have to pull.
And I don't know if I am ready for that.
To be wholly lost and fully gone.

Lately I have been feeling a lot of pressure.
I've been carrying the weight of everything and everyone I treasure.
So much so, I don't properly know where I am headed.
Maybe towards the lights?
Because being strong shouldn't be something I have to be all the time.
I shouldn't be strong.
I can't handle it.

There's no proper flow to this, I wish there was but like my life everything is everywhere and messy and unorganized.
**** man, my twenties have me mortified.

I just wish.
I don't know.

But I just wish that I didn't have to learn life like this.

It's sure as hell winning because I can't anymore.
Why is everything so much.