there are drops that tremble along the edges of my glass-- i stare into them, trying to see how they cradle blood in their atoms. they yield none of their secrets. they slide unnoticed through my veins. they are crystals that emerge gracelessly, unheeded to ponder the airless spaces that clutter my lungs. tonight they roam like ghosts to the unclean surfaces of skin that stretch grudgingly across my bones. they tremble to the lights. they are silver pepper that sting my cells alive yet i can't feel them singing. they inhabit me and uninhabit me too quickly for me to invite them home. they find no home in me, only poison to **** into their loving atoms blindly, uncaring that they are contaminated with my waste, my blood. they carry these things from me to pour back into the forge that melts my mistakes. they permeate any weakness to sustain it. to prevent me from bloating with toxicity that unconsciously finds its way inside especially on colored nights. they click their tongues at me while i'm sleeping, they can see my dirt-encrusted synapses and the hitches in my skin. they feed and chastise me from within.