it kills me when tears never spill
when that burning skin
starts to bother me
starts to feel like i should do something to tame it
it hurts
but i always stop
each time,
slightly more devoid of feeling
or at least the option to show it
maybe i shouldn't say sorry for the absence of feeling
maybe i should find a way to smile
but it's a lot easier to wallow
even if i know i shouldn't