Waking up feeling fresh, pills on the side,
Taking all of my strength not to pop them,
Man, I hope this feeling stays, been to hell and back,
too scared to make plans today,
s.h.i.t, am surprised even if my family and friends, know where I am,
It getting too hard to breathe, too hard to think straight,
with all the stuff running a million miles inside my head,
Scars on my legs and my body, a story of the past,
scars forever to last, sometimes, Maybe I am better dead,
People scream, ******* Open up, Open up Like a book,
Then when I do, they all scream shut the hell up, it all about you,
Stare in the mirror and take a ******* hard look,
Thinking about why do they want me to be open, to close me down,
when all I do is sit and listen and help them,
Am I selfish or am I Narcissistic,
Maybe I need him, Maybe I want to be in him,
Maybe it is hard for me to speak,
Never speaking with anyone who seen him,
Asking and double question myself,
Should I start to redeem stuff I done,
So when I am gone, I can meet him,
Should I believe in God, Should I believe in Lucifer,
Should I believe in Mother Nature,
When I see nothing but hatred and humanity comes the executioner,
Should I become the crucifer, or become more of the newcomer,
Ran away from all the labels and chains they tried to bound me with,
Maybe I wasn't made for the nine to fives or the education system,
Maybe I was too F.u.cked up from the moment I was birthed,
Maybe I was too F.u.cked up to cope or maybe am cursed,
They tell me the drugs I need to stay sane,
sometimes, They refused and make me more insane,
I know they are prescripted but they help better,
Than the self medication drugs of the past,
Where paranoia and voices came way too fast,
Maybe am too F.u.cked up that I don't care,
Maybe am too far gone that all the truth stays in sight,
Maybe am too F.u.cked up that even the World's lies, flies,
Maybe am too F.u.cked up that everything I read and see,
My mind states the truth,
Maybe my mind makes me an racist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Feminist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Antifeminist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Communist,
Maybe my mind makes me an socialist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Fascist,
Maybe my mind makes me an conversationist,
Maybe my mind makes me an colonizationist,
Maybe my mind makes me an preservationist,
Maybe my mind makes me an conventionalist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Abortionist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Antiabortionist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Pyschiatrist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Nonpyschiatrist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Intellectualist,
Maybe my mind makes me an experimentalist,
Maybe my mind makes me an obstructionist,
Maybe my mind makes me an segregationist,
Maybe my mind makes me an integrationist,
Maybe my mind makes me an Cooperationist,
Maybe my mind is too f.u.cked that It everything,
Where it see nothing but the both side of each story,
All the lies, all the hate, and all the truth,
Maybe my mind loves to self debate,
Reform and reshaped the views and opinions,
to make others screams and cry like onions,
Maybe Am too mess up to say "I wish",
That I could change and not be who I am,
but then that going against everyone who screams,
Be proud of who you are, stay true to yourself,
Maybe, it those who scream be proud and stay true to yourself,
are those who are way to easy to offend and tick off,
and unable to handle the ******* truth,
unable to handle the honest from those who value,
Demanding and screaming handle because it shallow.