I am scared.
I cannot escape this nightmare
that you have created. Why is
it following me everywhere I
go? Why can't you just be gone.
Why did you have to exist at all?
All you did was **** me up in the
head. I was forever changed by
what you did to me, by what no
one did to fix it. No one tried to
make it better. No one cared enough
to make you go away. No one locked
you up. No one threw you out. You
were allowed to stay. In the place
that I am supposed to feel the
safest, the house of God. You were
allowed to stay. Even though you
****** me up. They call that religion?
They think they can point fingers at
me because I lost most of my faith?
Is it religious to let someone take a piece
of your soul, to violate them and not
be reprimanded? That is what you call
religion? Do you think He would look
down upon you and praise you for that?
Do you think He would blame me for
turning my back on the church when the
church was supposed to be there for me?
I do not think He will think any less of me
for the decisions I have made based upon
what has been allowed by His church to
happen. I think, when my time comes and
my days on Earth are completed, that He
will not only open his golden gates for me,
but also joyously welcome me with open
arms and His loving embrace.