today
instead of
feeling better
feeling prettier
feeling less like
a *******
when i drew
black lines
across my eyes
i felt
disconnected.
the lengthening curves
did not flatter me
they made me
hollow
hungry
old.
electrical tape
holding together
burned out fuses
they carved me out
left me
for dead
all i wanted
was some help
all i got
was a reminder
of my impending
futility
my impending dissatisfaction
i always top off
too quickly
i'll need something else
to make me feel better
soon.