it was a painful transition,
the adjustment
of not having you in my life
anymore
thinking our story was over
not aware that it was
to be continued
I was prepared for twenty years or more
of silence
and now that you’re back
and trying again
I do admit
that I am still
expecting the worst
because I know all too well
how fast things can change
I’m expecting you
to leave again
I don’t know any other
way to feel safe.
I love you
and even though needing you
is purely unavoidable,
I don’t know if I will ever
stop trying
to avoid it.