sitting up,
i mean laying down at 2 a.m.,
these intrusive thoughts once again so rudely knocking on the walls of my mind and barging in through the doors,
keeping me up longer,
when all i crave is slumber,
trying to control my breathing in hopes that i'll finally fall under,
listening to the same song on repeat,
one after another, they yank on my heart strings,
these oh so rude thoughts,
wishing i could clean out my brain and make things to be much more neat,
because these thoughts, these things i am feeling,
make my heart race and my stomach tighten,
desperately wanting these memories to brighten,
but i can't help when my anxiety creeps up in the dead of the night,
shaking me to the core,
once more leaving my heart sore.