I am annoyed that I express myself better in writing than speech.
I suppose it's because no one can see your tears behind a screen. 
Even more so, perhaps it's because no one can hear my inner thoughts.
Maybe I like the freedom of how my worry turns into hope turns into fear.
In my inner head, I call you a coward. Looking down on your weakness.
I can't let go of this anger borderline hatred. I refuse the notion to forgive.
Instead, I hang on to this and it is not to punish you.
I cannot let go, so I will not forget that it is not safe to trust.
Not okay to fall in love.