I wrote you so many poems.
They’re all here as evidence.
I couldn’t let you read them.
I loved you so much.
Depression is a cold and heartless thing.
I tried to fight her while keeping you out of harms way.
I couldn’t feel anything, just like I’ve said.
I wanted to feel something.
I even said pain would suffice.

A year later.
You’ve hurt me so bad.
I feel it all now.
All the love.
All the pain.
I miss you so much.
I wish I was strong enough to show you these when you were here with me.

I wish you would’ve talked to me before you picked up the gun.
I wish you would’ve thought before you pulled the trigger.
I wish a lot of things, A.
But most of all, I wish you were still here on earth with me.

I love you.