I can't express how I feel.

I wanted to write a sad poem about the black hole swallowing me up from within.

I wanted to express the seeping darkness that threatens me to exist.

But I just can't find the words.

I can't express this emptiness I feel inside.

It feels as if I'm drowning in each of my comfortable lies.

I crave comfort, warmth.

Someone to look me in the eyes and to feel that soul connection.

But every time I feel that pull my mind wanders in a different direction.

Like I refuse to make myself happy, I don't believe I deserve it with this icy core.

I've felt numb for so long I'm starting to doubt that I even have a soul anymore.

I could be surrounded by all of the people who love, care, and wish the best for me but I'd still feel so utterly alone.

Like the space I've built to comfort myself is suddenly foreign, no longer home.

A bystander of my own life.

Watching things on a movie screen pass me by.

Going through the motions just to feel like I am doing something.

Anything, instead of nothing at all.