There is a ubiquitous
fear
that rests in the darker parts of my soul.
There is a fear so strong,
so palpable,
that it controls my thoughts.
It completely diminishes my capacity for
emotion.

My soul,
the negatives of my life,
have been pre exposed to the harsh rays of
reality
too often to be developed now.
There is permanent damage,
never to be undone.

Damage that one can only become
accustomed to.
So, I will live in fear.

I will live in fear of revealing
too much.
I will live in fear of feeling
too strongly.

I will live in fear of any person
that tries to touch my
mangled heart.
I will live in fear of any person
that tries to sift through the
raging storms in my mind.
I will live in fear of any person that gets close
enough to touch.

I will live in
perpetual fear.
I will live with the reality of my destruction
haunting me.

I will live in
ruins,
never to be rebuilt.