I wish I was nine again. Tiny and happy. I wish it was still me and Erin playing in mud, and picking up bugs.
Fretting when we'll have to shower, or go to bed.
"I miss that."
As the ages went up, my happiness went down. Like I was slowly being submerged under the deep cold water.
"I miss that."
The way we'd meet up on neopets instead of Facebook.
"I miss that."
I didn't have to worry about my size, or hair. I don't like to worry. Care free and friendly.
"I miss that."
Sometimes I think I should end it all, and come back as a beautiful, size zero, daffodil. Ha, I wish.
"I miss that."
I try and try again, but the scars on my wrist show what a failure I've become. Seeing scar free wrist's.
"I miss that."
Me, a size twelve, depressed *****, who is doomed to a life alone. I'm not the prettiest flower in my garden bed, in fact I'm poison ivy plant that threads your precious "daffodils." I once was a daffodil, not a care in the world.
"I miss that."
I'm now the sun that wilts your leaves and drains your life. Except now the hot rays are hitting me, and my blood is boiling and my roots are drying up.
Anxiety haunts me, as razors taunt me. Oh how I want to be young again,