Why am I so scared of your opinion?

I act as if I need no one around,
But secretly long for someone to see me.
The real me that I keep hidden away.
The real me that is so ashamed of who they are
That they lock the doors and cry silent tears,
But smile and laugh when you are around!

Why am I so afraid of my past escaping?

I pretend that I have it all together
When I'm terrified to be left alone,
For that is when the devil dressed in human disguises
Uproots the faith you once had in the world as a child.
For now I struggle to leave my bed, my house
Without a wave, or a shade of fear and dread.

Why am I terrified of this world I live in?

I'm terrified of the overwhelming, deprecating nature of humans
And their persistent need to hurt and destroy.
I feel as though, as I've grown, my body is no longer my own!
An overwhelming thought of this life never truly being my own.
When a man or woman can do so as they please to tare you apart,
Leads to hope of avoiding living a life I have no wish to live.

For you see...
Living a life of fear
Is to be barely living at all.
So what's the point in going on?