A day of roses and wine.

Everyone's posting their Valentine.

I awoke, grabbed my cat from the end of the bed
And we fell back asleep for what
Felt like quite some time.

I sit in steam rooms with a dear friend
Let the toxins you didn't believe in
Slowly release, expel, drip down
My glossy swan like skin.

I sit at pastel table clothed desks
I throw my head back when I laugh
I adorn my hair with pretty little things
As it grows strong, long
And do squats at the gym until
My muscles are good and sore.

I look into the mirror
At dilated eyes
And take in the fever
Of letting another one
Go.

It is bitterly cold
I am not able to embrace it
Nor do I hate it
I just know its not for me
Or mine.

I drink coffee until I'm hungry
I answer emails in a hurry
I'm always pushing a chest of drawers
Up a cavernous mountain
With a little help from my friends
But mostly on my own.

I listen to music, commanding google
I wonder who is together
Who is alone.

I ponder and sometimes feel anger
At the way life topples everything onto you at once
All while needing to unpack my baggage
Into a safe haven.

I recognize there is no going back
Maturity sings songs to me
Of only moving forward
Even though it is immensely uncomfortable
Even though bitterness threatens to reckon my name
Even though the cold reminds me of the heat
I must create on my own.

Sunshine and palm trees
Loom and zoom near me
I know I'll get to them in time
In time
In time.

The journey as always
Is just getting started.