I awoke, grabbed my cat from the end of the bed And we fell back asleep for what Felt like quite some time.
I sit in steam rooms with a dear friend Let the toxins you didn't believe in Slowly release, expel, drip down My glossy swan like skin.
I sit at pastel table clothed desks I throw my head back when I laugh I adorn my hair with pretty little things As it grows strong, long And do squats at the gym until My muscles are good and sore.
I look into the mirror At dilated eyes And take in the fever Of letting another one Go.
It is bitterly cold I am not able to embrace it Nor do I hate it I just know its not for me Or mine.
I drink coffee until I'm hungry I answer emails in a hurry I'm always pushing a chest of drawers Up a cavernous mountain With a little help from my friends But mostly on my own.
I listen to music, commanding google I wonder who is together Who is alone.
I ponder and sometimes feel anger At the way life topples everything onto you at once All while needing to unpack my baggage Into a safe haven.
I recognize there is no going back Maturity sings songs to me Of only moving forward Even though it is immensely uncomfortable Even though bitterness threatens to reckon my name Even though the cold reminds me of the heat I must create on my own.
Sunshine and palm trees Loom and zoom near me I know I'll get to them in time In time In time.