You see when I was young
I was a target to a tease
And the teasing was really bad
I hated it, because they were treating me like a money bank
It made me worry about working in a proper job
Like I wouldn’t take hostage situations
At work very well
And I don’t know how I my mental health will take a robber robbing my place of work
I know you are supposed to give them the money to remain safe
But that seems the easy way out
But overall I want to win the argument
So if I work in a job like that
I would like someone with me
So I wouldn’t have to do it on my own
I know everyone is scared of that
But sometimes my mental illness makes me want to win the battle
And I feel worried if I lose
I wouldn’t want to get shot by a bullet though
It is just a worry
I am interested in working one day
And I don’t want to let that stop me
From working
I feel the teasing in the past makes me look up when I was at work
It was awful I know discipline is good
But really I feel worried about people teasing me in the future
Like they did then
Like I work in one job
They work in a better job
I used to be hassled in giving people money and if I didn’t I would be classed as uncool
And I didn’t want to be uncool
So I gave it to them
But I don’t want that to happen again
You see I used to be too shy to speak up for myself and I found it hard to
Tell people no
And I look up every time to do something they do
Please Buddha help me get through
My looking for work
Because instead of speaking up for myself I did stupid things
I feel anxious about the whole thing
Which forced me to look up
I hope I get through this at work