Something has happened, and I'd be remiss
If I neglected to tell you this:
There's reason to worry, but try to calm down.
Acrobat is back in town!
His ancestors lived at the Long Beach Pike
Starting way back in the days of Ike.
You have a right to be concerned,
For people all over the town have been burned.
Not a very good diplomat
Is Acrobat, the harbor cat.

When you're dining, be on guard:
He doesn't leave a calling card.
Calamari has its appeal,
But sushi is Acrobat's favorite meal.
He'll ****** the salmon right off of the rice.
(He much prefers seafood to mice.)
Before fried cod can touch your lips,
He'll steal the fish but leave the chips.
He doesn't need a welcome mat--
Not Acrobat, the harbor cat.

At barbecues it's always unclear
How certain items can disappear.
So if you are missing a sausage or two,
A chicken leg, or even a few,
It's not too hard to believe, is it,
That Acrobat was paying a visit?
Swiping food for him is a cinch.
But rodents…well…they'll do in a pinch.
Be on the lookout if you are a rat
For Acrobat, the harbor cat.

There are some who can outfox a fox.
Just after dawn on the fishing docks,
Out of the blue, someone yells, "Wait!
What has happened to all my bait?"
While he stands there scratching his head,
They say that behind the cleaning shed,
Hidden among the buckets and mops,
Acrobat sits, licking his chops.
He won't hang around and stay for a chat--
Not Acrobat, the harbor cat.

Now Acrobat, a cagey sort,
Doesn't believe in child support.
He WON'T help raise his progeny
And blames it all on phylogeny.
He's quite the dandy and quite the cad.
But watch out if you make him mad.
I would wager that many regret
Ignoring him as a credible threat.
You really want to avoid a spat
With Acrobat, the harbor cat.

-by Bob B (1-23-20)