What the heck am I going to do this summer?
I've always had something planned out,
But when I was told I had mono,
My summer plans changed.
I cannot do lifeguarding now,
And I've called several places,
I'm supposed to be studying for two tests tomorrow,
So I didn't goto track today.
I'm dealing with acne on my face,
I'm extremely tired,
I'm always under stress.
If I'm not under stress,
I  feel as if I have nothing to do,
And I'll get depressed.
I still have the regents,
And finals,
And tests,
And homework.
I recently got my license,
But I have yet to drive.
I'm tired,
I'm tired...
I constantly worry.
When I try to take a day off,
And let myself relax,
I feel like nothing,
Like I have absolutely nothing to do.
Why am I writing a poem,
When I'm supposed to be studying?
I had an idea of where I'd like to go to college,
But now I'm clueless.
I need someone to tell me everything will be fine,
That I'll have plently to do,
That I'm a sweet, special girl.
I hope I play tennis again in the summer.
I hope I get the volunteer job.
But I haven't handed the form in yet...
Could it be too late?
How can I calm down?
Can can I ever calm down?
Life is too hard for me,
I wish I cold do more than I can,
And I push myself more than I can.
I sometimes feel dead,
Brainfired,
Tired.
Just tired.
Why am I itching my face?
Because it's all red,
From the sun beating down on it each day at track.
I have it all,
But I feel as if I have nothing.
I'm not depressed,
I'm not suicidal,
I'm not even sad...
I feel empty suddenly,
And constantly tired.