I wish I could be as
transparent as you are
it would be as simple as saying

I've changed my mind
kiss me

or maybe

yes, I really do like you

or even

you say you're missing a girlfriend?
no, you're not. I'm right here.

but I prefer honesty to transparency
so I'll just hug you each time we meet
and smile as you wrap your arms around me

and hope you haven't found someone new
and pray that it's you each time my phone vibrates
and consider texting you first, but i won't
because I don't do that and I'd only be bothering you

and because I value honesty
I'll be honest with myself:
I've ******* up again
and you don't want me anymore

it's just as well
I would have messed up
sooner or later
anyway.