When you head up the ***** of the Kirkstone Pass,
so-called for the rock, a glacier's erratic,
that's shaped like a chapel and stands at the head
of the steeply-raked pass

There's a place where the valley far down below you
splits either side of the hill, called 'The Tongue'
Way below is a farm at the tip of 'The Tongue'
from this height, so tiny, it looks like a toy

Be careful!  Don't go to the edge of the roadway
or your fall will be sharp and you might not survive
Drive on, up the twisting ascent of the mountain
until, near the summit, you spot Kirkstone Inn

It's built at the junction of the pass and 'The Struggle'-
the latter a test of a new driver's skill-
its car park a stop for walkers and drivers,
its promise of welcome a tangible call

What a wonderful feeling of warmth as you enter
You're inside, enjoying a favorite brew
Check up on the map, now decide where you're going,
then say your adieus and be back on the road