I feel like I’m ready to give up
to be honest.
I just dealt with the hardest year of
my life and it was all for nothing.
Once he’s gone I’ll have nothing.
I am nothing.

Maybe I’ll just find a decent, boring man
and get married because it’s better than
dying alone.
I’ll have a kid or two because there’s
nothing else to do and it would be nice
to feel love that is actually real.

And since I’ll never see him again,
I’ll forget all about him.
Never say his name or think of his face.

Hopefully some day I won’t feel
so empty and none of this will hurt anymore.
Hopefully some day I can be okay again.