The past was brutal
Failed relationships countless times
Failed attempts at ending my life
Mother who abandoned me
I mean who the hell does that ****
She wasn't meant to be a mother

The present is just as worst
Distant relationships with the closest of family
Resentment for everybody who ever told me ******* cliches
Maturing too fast that it's unpleasant and unbearable
No one can understand me anymore
The sad part is that a future is almost unlikely

The future still unclear
I don't think I can salvage one
But I made the plans to go far
And I will take each step with a delicate caution
Till that one step that sends me to oblivion
Everything is just a blur

The past, the present, the future
What each and any holds for me
Is still quite unknown
And there is nobody to guide me anymore
Its all my fault because I pushed them all away
So whatever may happens I deserve it
Even if that may be more misery or death