She came a kickin through the doorway
Just sbout  as mad as I've ever seen
her hair was on Fire and she smelled like gasoline
She was spittin out words at a mile a minute
I tried to intervene with a word or two
But I couldn't even squeeze a syllable in between
But it seem to have something to do with her daughter...  Delta Dean
who had just barely turned 17
And just as pretty as a vine ripe  peach
And I know that you know
Exaaactly ...what I mean!

I  figured it was probably some young stud
Who decided to see if he was tall enough to reach

Whoever he was
trying to see if he could get into that tree
I kind of feel sorry for ya
whoever you may be
I can't imagine Colleen
Puttin up  with anyone to trifle
And I imagine she's up there now
searching up and down looking all around
Fit to be tied and ready to rip off my hide
If she cant figure out where I might of hid
Her daddies old rusty trusty squirrel killin rifle I mumbled out a prayer
up under my breath
I don't know Who You are
but if you have any sense
you'd be scared to death
A making Fast tracks for getting out of the state
or out of the county
at any rate
and then I heard her coming back down
When she stepped on that old creaky step
went up in a rage but came back down
Much more sedate
earrings in her hand and I guess
that she saw that strange look on my face
so she kissed my cheek
and she said I don't know if I can take it
she wants to drive
and  that's okay
but she got my diamond stud earring
and I got to wear these of little old pearls today
As she was Heading out the door
i started to let myself say
Pearls Before swine
but at the very last second
I grabbed my tongue  
And I changed my mind ......



What the hell were you thinkin ....
   You been drinkin ?No!   Well maybe we outa be
Cause that was too close .