I remember once
My cousin called me an inspiration
He cuts
Or used to at least...
He couldn't deal with the pain
Didn't know how i could handle all of mine
Truth is
I couldnt.

He said i was amazing
For going through everything i did
And how i didn't even break down
Become a cutter,
Suicidal

He said i was strong
For standing high
In the midst of things
And how they were all proud of me
And how he wished
He could be
A bit like me

I guess that
*******
Happiness
Facade
D id the trick,

Fooled everyone.

Not me.
                                                                      
Only I remember
The timeless hours spent
Crying in bed
Mad at the world
With the world mad
Right back at me
Wishing i was gone
Not knowing
What the ****
To do with my pity *** self

Guess i pulled through
Good enough to
Satisfy the rest