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Aug 2019
My insane eyes are telling me to calm down
I see a fault, it’s always always mine
I have no chill, I’m breaking in my car now
I can’t return to how it was before
I wish I was a month ago or later
Cause it’s right now, the pain is growing still
The tumor grows until it melts my body
As I stand still every time the heat just rise

My flows are grating in the crows
My circumference is hiding
Making fine words are growing in time

“I let the world crush my bare leaf hands
And let the ground dissolve my footsteps
Maybe if things were aligned
I would be standing straight”
(That was the spark of it all. But now)
Grinning laughter kiss my face
So far under the duvet
Grammy has a fit, painters are so lit
Anything is fine

Home I am is number one
And so the crapping starts
My illusion is a ****
And I have no parts

Can I contract love?
Some things are like a disease
And do I have to say please

I cannot try to copy distance
I don’t know how to tell you I feel this
If I shared it with you, would you notice anything?
Would you just say cool and leave and make me shake again?

Sander on the laugh of cure
I know that you’re bored
I wish I could say anything
But what do you want?

Is it me or you
Who does these things that I do
I’m not trying to imitate you
I can’t swear on that
You are the reason I think
Really, on any of these things

Folding chair
Green sweater
No, not that one
Or grey hoodie
With red grungey text
That blurry photo but in higher quality
Where your knee is up there
Chicago
Have you been there?
We could have been in the same room
You are rich
Rich beyond belief
I can imagine it
It’s not unimaginable
I fail to not find it unimaginable
I fail to picture your face crystal clear
Every mental image is from a still photo

My arrangement is gold
This a song that I came from
My direction is old
And I never will learn from
My sedation is gruesome
So I touch everyone
I wish I could be stronger and tell you the truth but
My solution is far away
From my willing cards

My ears are thin and they cannot hear anything
Everything is just a little lie
Nothing is kind and everything is full of crime
That’s too far but I just want to (die?)

My begottens are hybrid game
For the one who will catch my eye
My solution is great pain
For I wanted to try
Such a dangerous game and the wilder I’m smoothing
It’s the worse you see me
When I try to glide
Under you

My arms are a mess of the biggest mistake
My giant illusion is trying to wake
My senses are tingling
It sure doesn’t matter
What I am trying to do
I wish I could just hear your voice once again
But not a recording, something you do for me
Don’t sound like a robot
This is getting too personal
But don’t go away
(What even is this?)
Written by
Trout  Chicago
(Chicago)   
169
   Bogdan Dragos
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