feel so stupid 
feel so dumb
feel too old
to be this young
feel too broken
and seem too weak
feel too overwhelmed 
to know how to speak
cause it feels so hard
and hurts so bad
it's a neverending storm of issues
that makes me feel like crap
just feel so cut off
disconnected from everyone else
feel so much
i can't think beyond myself
consumed by obssesions
compulsed to hurt
driven to insanity
enslaved to the words
as i lay with my eyes wide open
and feel like its all too much
i feel empty and like
i'm about to explode all at once
cause im pulled apart
by who i am and who i was
so who i want to be tends
to get left behind in the dust
and i struggle to behave
the way that i should
inside there's a war
and i'm praying that the good
can overcome the evil
that wants to surface
a battle between 
living or dying to be perfect
i just feel so stupid
so dumb so discouraged 
like i could try my hardest
and it wouldnt be worth it
because i'd fail not only myself
but everyone around me
one second i'm blissfully ignorant
the next i am drowning
i don't know where this comes from
i'm scared to be alone
the voices in my head take over
and tell you what they know