my mom likes to entertain scenarios
of how her life would’ve been
sans my father
lilah and riley wouldn’t have been here
she raises her eyebrows in disbelief
of the life she’s stuck with
you would’ve had a stepdad and a new step mom

crazy.

divided household and i would’ve
met you still
but not’ve known you..
a boy i knew until i was in 4th grade
maybe weeks on and weeks off at my moms to dads would’ve spared me
from your routine heartbreaks you graciously offer me with a ribbon on top in my
favorite color-
brown
maybe if i had 4 parents they would they have taken me to do my hair when they found out about my
first boyfriend,
curls sizzled to pin straight strands like strained love ties,
the 2 houses glowing as if
it was Christmas
and the 3 magi would be different this time-
in the form of middle aged hispanic women
offering advice on how to make him
immovable
completely entranced with my 14 year old being
wrapped around my nail-bitten-to-the-nub finger
siempre joo need to wear perfumé
the first one said
always wax joo eyebrows y joo piernas- no man likes a hairy girl- es
disgusted
the second broke down
her neck & nose was shiny with vicks
the third eyeing my from across the room
disappointed i turned down
the idea of brujería