She can’t communicate
Her mother never taught her how
Or how to open up
How to actively be the person she is
So she talks and laughs
Giggles and cries
Although tears never quite seem to come…
At least not when someone, anyone else is there                
To see
Or help or comfort
Or even just empathize
Those stopped back in the fourth grade
Back when boys had cooties
And you weren’t invited to birthday parties
Because the other girls thought you were a witch
Or smelly
Back in the fourth grade
When little Amber Gibbs became the most popular girl in school
And took her best friend away
And told Andrew Moretz all about her crush on him
And he never would talk to her after that
That’s when she stopped crying in front of people
Or at least people who mattered
Tear are a sign of weakness
And everyone knows in middle school
If you see weakness in someone
Then exploit it
Cause if everyone’s laughing at them
They’re not laughing at you
And that’s what matters
So she learned
The hard way, but she learned
That others are mean
Not even moms can be counted on
And her diary
That book of blank paper
Just inviting, ready to listen
Became her best, and then her only friend
Her diary was the only one who listened
Sometimes she made believe
It was her older brother
Still born before her
To whom she wrote
Make believing he actually cared
About the wants and petty problems
Of a 14 year old girl
With her head in the clouds
But her heart in a lock box.