May 2019
I'm sorry God
If I've let you down,
I know I've done something
To deserve this punishment.
To deserve no friends,
To deserve no happiness,
To deserve no luck,
To deserve it all.
What have I done?
That has made it this way?
Can you tell me why
A being of heaven
Has brought me hell?
What have I done?
Why do I deserve
To be locked in this life
And bruised by the past
And stabbed by the present
And threatened by the future?
What can I do
To please you, God?
So that you shall bring me peace?
What more do I have to give
To get a bit of it back?
I'm sorry, God
If I've let you down,
But you have to let me live.
I know you know not
Of mortal pains and suffering,
But you of all beings
Must know some sympathy.
When can you end this madness?
What more must I achieve
To appease the ultimate puppeteer?
How much more must I sacrifice
To be worthy of your affection?
What must I apologize for
That will allow you to free me
To bail me out
To leave me be
To let me go?
Have you reached your breaking point?
When will such a day arrive?
I'm sorry, God
If I've let you down,
But don't you think
That all of your people,
Including myself,
Deserve a blessing at some point?
Deserve some freedom?
When we know not
Of what we have done?
Oh, God, when will that freedom come
If not in the form of angel wings?
