Two strapping squadies sat on a tank
Both just been for a sly ham shank
One called Peter one called Paul
Both rather partial to the others smalls

Along came the Sgt he didn't want to play
Went and told the CO he thought they were gay
Along came the MPs in their red hats
Dragged them to the guard house quick as a flash

Now a court martial and public ridicule
The Sgt said the showers where not safe at all
A dishonerable discharge for being a ***
Being a soldier was all that they had

Twenty years latter we now go to war
You love a man or woman even three or four
The Army doesnt care if you play the rear flank
So long as you can shoot to ****
Or drive a Tommy tank

Well that was then and this is now
Many came back from another gulf war
Hounded like prey by the lawyers of today
For doing exactly what the CO says

So sign up Peter sign up Paul
Do what you like with you best friends smalls
But for heaven's sake be you John or Jane
DON'T SHOOT ANYONE IN THE GOVERNMENTS
NAME!!