I need so much to lay next to her, to hold her hands and talk about everything. I need to make her smile and give her kisses on her cheek. I need to kiss her lips and run my hands up her sides and to pull her close to me. I need to fall asleep with her in my arms, knowing that once and for all, everything is going to be okay.
I need to be worthy of her. To amaze her with the love I can give to her. Allow me to ruin her expectations that she could have for anyone else.
It hurts so much to be separated. Our souls are connected. I believe they always have been. We have lived a thousand lives and we have always found one another in each of them. Maybe each time we've been forced apart for the same reasons.
I sometimes ask myself why do we have what we have? Why do we love? What power would allow us to love so deeply if it were not meant to be and so right to do so? We both know deep down in our hearts we were meant to be together and have been throughout time.
We live with the ache and sadness that comes with how things are right now and we pray for the strength to endure. To have the patience to continue to believe and keep hope alive in our hearts.
I ask Him to forgive the sinner that I am and to please guide me to the peace I pray to have one day. To see the price I have paid in my life and all that I have given up in my attempt to be a good woman. I ask for mercy and to allow me the love I never thought I would find in my lifetime.
I believe we all deserve that one true love that was meant to be, That one soul that connects perfectly with another. No matter what we go through in our lives, I believe that connection will always exist. Its only up to us to be fortunate enough to find it in our lifetime. I hope we can all find it this time around.