I'm so sad that you are gone.

I know you asked where the door was
So I showed you the way out
But like I wrote you
I was
Well
I enjoyed in moments
The way that you looked in my life
I've been sitting in the darkness
I've been letting the inches of snow
And the way my pillow is starting to lose the smell of you
Dismantle me.

I thought and I wish
That maybe we could have talked
We could have worked it out
It seems as though my final words
Have brought you at long last
To a stone cold silence
For, it is true
I've given you so much to think about.

My friends say I'll be over this one in no time
I believe them
I wish I hadn't tried to get so cozy
But what was I to do?

You wrote me only two poems
In the time we were together
Neither a love poem
But an expression of your fear.

I accepted that fear
As if it were my own cross to bare
Because I saw in myself
That it was worth it to keep you
And now I have to just forget you.

You read the words about me outloud
You have the crystals I gifted you
I revealed all the things I was trying, striving to do
To elevate to create
And yet it was never enough.

I know deep down this was never really about me
Though you did try to shame me for where I am
Where you are not
My head was clear, my eyes were open
I just demanded your presence.

As usual
There is nothing to be done now
I've looked through all the nooks and crannies
Trying to understand where things went wrong
Where maybe I...

But the truth is
The truth has always been
It was just always too hard
Too hard for me
In the end
To keep you.