I know that you must think
That there is no way I could care as much as you
Perhaps you think
With your long brown hair
That you were here first.

I told him today that I'd ******* if you weren't so weird about it.

We probably have more in common than just him.

It's impossible
For me to ignore your presence
I'll never forget the night
You came bounding up the stairs
And danced right near me
Your hair swinging long
I wonder how it is that you see me
I wonder how it is that you view us.

He stood along the wall
Aware of you
Aware of me
Lifting his gaze up and meeting my eyes
Like he'd lost me a thousand and one times
And never wanted to own up to it.
I looked back
And then away.

It doesn't really matter
I don't want to compete with someone I don't know
And I don't know that I need to know you
Making it clear with an unpronounced
Quiet threat
That I'm the enemy.

I'm the big dog on campus
I don't know that I'll ever need to
Announce that your way
But can't you see little girl
My bark isn't just the loudest
It echoes the longest.

I worry that the public
Might think that I don't know
That I'm over here being fooled
But I dress in head to toe black lace
Like I'm some kind of **** widow
Purchasing tickets
Making plans
I strive to move up and out
Though my own fears
Bulldoze me the most.

I wonder if you see me in your mind
Or if you cry about me the way I do you
Do you fear that he speaks to me the same way
Have you looked through his phone
Do you look at me occasionally
Do you do what you can to feel stable
In whatever
This messy and unpronounced
Love triangle is?

Just because you were here first
Just because you've known him for longer
Just because you went to the same school
Or worked on the same sets

Doesn't mean you love him better than I do.

But then again

I was never interested in competing with you anyway.