All she ever wanted was control.
She stood at the bathroom mirror
And as she stared at her reflection
She saw her fingers pick up the scissors
And chop her hair
They fell in little Tufts around her.
She kept cutting
She told herself it was better than cutting her skin
She decided it wasn't enough
She wanted more
So she picked up a razor and buzzed of any hair that was still part of her head
She couldn't clearly see the back of her head
And as she moved stretching she nicked herself
Blood trickled down her neck and she wondered how did she get here.
It's not that she didn't try
She had tried
But they wouldn't believe her
They wouldn't believe her when she said
She woke up sad
That she felt different
Empty, detatched
That her insides ached ached in a way that no injury could.
Somehow now her head felt lighter without all that hair.
Somehow she felt better
Even if for just a while.