Today I had the realization,
That I used to never dress for myself.
And funny enough,
I realized this,
While I was buying bras and *******.


I asked myself:
“I now bought these but who will see them? And will they love them? Will I be looked at like I’m ****? Will I be beautiful?”
As I asked myself these questions I realized I never bought for myself.

But I bought them anyways.
I bought them because I’ll look at them. I’ll dress in the bras and ******* and find myself ****.
I’ll find myself beautiful.
I’ll get in them and look at myself in the mirror without fear that the person I’m with won’t love them.
Because I’ll love myself.

This is the realization I waited for.
I’m not waiting for love.
And I never realized that every time I bought things I never bought for me.
I bought to be validated by my partner.
But I don’t need that.

I’m my own validation.
I love how I look.
I have a small chest and ****.
Yet I don’t have to make sure the person I’m with will love them. No. I’ll make sure I love the way I look.

I always believed personality was better than looks yet there I was buying for my partner. And I don’t need that.

I’m buying for me. And I’m buying for self love.