I can't get this taste out of my mouth,
the bitterness of regret and fear.

I'm so scared of the consequences.

what have I done? why?

I was so upset that I didn't even pay attention.

as I put a knife to my skin,  i looked away and thought nothing of it.

But when my eyes met back with my leg, I realized how much deeper I cut than normal. how much blood as pouring out of my flesh.

and for some reason, after cleaning the blood, everything stood still.

No pain, no blood, but tears and anxiety and the feeling of overwhelming dizziness.

When I realized what was happening I was already rushing to the bathroom. my stomach trying to push out its last meal.

and in the end I just covered it up as I would any other small cut.

the bitterness still resides in the back of my throat and runs through my mouth.

and the tears threaten to spill as I sit behind my unknowing parents.

But I can't say anything