It seems that bacon
Has come back from the dead
And is everywhere these days

There is even bacon ice cream
Bacon whiskey
Bacon tacos

Yeh I love bacon
But I don’t like the fake bacon

You can get beef bacon
Turkey bacon
Tofu bacon

All look like bacon
Taste like bacon
Cook like bacon
Seems to be bacon

But it is all sham
Nothing real about it

Just another fake healthy food
In a long line
Of fake food products

Designed to get our money
Out of our pockets
And into their greedy little arms

So, I resist
I want the real deal
I want bacon real bacon
With my real eggs

And if it means
I am fated

To die of a real heart attack
At least I will die
A real man