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Nov 2018
I’m sorry
I couldn’t Stay dedicated.
Couldn’t get off drugs completely.
I’m sorry
My Drug use impacted
My present with you.
That I couldn’t manage to Keep my problem just to myself.

Knowing What I became
Brings a lot of disgust to your face.
The last thing you ever imagined..
Was to end up with a druggie.
I’m sorry
You were cursed & Brought the opposite of what you desired.
I know I’m far off
Your Type & what your
attracted to.
Im so sorry.

I feel bad because
You never made yourself aware.
I wish to go back in time
& Explain to you What Being an addict was & How difficult I’d become Once I’d get sober.
How my mind won’t function accordingly, how much of a mess I turned into.
I wish to go back & Explain well to where you’d back off me.
You never Expected
That my problem was really going to be a big deal ..

I know You wish to have
Been Inlove with a previous girl.
I know you’d wish
Your 1st love turned out to be
The one you’d marry.
I’m so sorry you ended up
With A terrible downgrade.

I’m deeply sorry
For not being stronger.
I held strong Through all your insults & Hurtful things
You’d tell me,
I held strong when I
was just your toy
Being told
“we will never be anything”
I held strong through all the rain & thunder you put me through before we got together.

I assumed
Being your girlfriend
Would change Everything.
We’d start fresh & be
happily Inlove.

That’d I’d be able to let go
Of all the hurt & move on
Having a strong loving
bond with you.

We Then Got Together
I even committed to
forever leave drugs.
Because I was serious on making us work & leaving behind all things that Made us impossible.
A new chapter
Filled with smiles & laughter
A fresh start.

So I had thought.
Little Had I known
Getting together
Wasn’t the answer to
Anything.
PEARL SMOKE
Written by
PEARL SMOKE  23/F/los Angeles
(23/F/los Angeles)   
176
   Harley Hucof
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