it's happened already, we know this, for sure
but nothing solidifies it more concretely
as when i hear you say it to your friends

it happened a year ago, completely, for sure
because when we both started acting discretely
i had already seen two different ends

one in which the path would straighten
and we'd grow the same way, as before
one in which we end up so far apart
that it wouldn't
matter
it might even have healed by now
but i didn't anticipate the third
or the fourth
or the fifth
nor the sixth
the seventh, eleventh
the eighth, the hate
the ninth, not mine
not even yours, surely

because i really care for you, and i don't want you to die
i just want us to be honest about what's left of you and i