Oct 2018
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't look into your eyes, see your abusive father open your bedroom door at midnight and you keep putting yourself in front of your younger sister so that only one of you feel that pain that's breaking you
How you hate all men
Watch you play those memories as you smile at me and say you wouldn't mind being in a relationship
I can't see you stabbing a needle into your left arm so that you can forget the woman who left you, took your children and most of your wealth, after she paid her friend that you've never met to ****** and sleep with you and spiked the drink you had before you went out for drinks with your mates
How you feel like you've worked for nothing
Watch you stand there and tell me getting married is the only way to find stability as a man and how that will help you grow
I can't see you with 3 kids you're raising by yourself because every man who's gotten you pregnant has disappeared and left you with a child you didn't want but love and 2 7 hour jobs to try and make enough to get by
How you think that loyalty is a fable.
Yet you stand there telling me that being a single mother isn't as hard as most people think.
I can't see you with skinned knuckles from bar fights from a temper you can't control. Reciprocating an anger you inherited from a drunk father who came home and beat you and your sister because someone spilt his beer.
How you think it's okay to never apologise.
Yet you stand there saying that fighting won't solve any problems.
I can't see you see how I'm lost from not being able to connect to people. That I sit in corners that are dark and empty so that I cannot face the fact that I've stopped telling anyone anything because I've had enough of my pain being treated like a norm and that I should be able to handle it.
How I can't try to move forward.
Yet I stand here and say that I enjoy our (empty) conversations.
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't keep looking into your eyes and seeing such raw truth hidden behind pretty lies.
It's breaking me
It's breaking all of us
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't look into your eyes, see your abusive father open your bedroom door at midnight and you keep putting yourself in front of your younger sister so that only one of you feel that pain that's breaking you
How you hate all men
Watch you play those memories as you smile at me and say you wouldn't mind being in a relationship
I can't see you stabbing a needle into your left arm so that you can forget the woman who left you, took your children and most of your wealth, after she paid her friend that you've never met to ****** and sleep with you and spiked the drink you had before you went out for drinks with your mates
How you feel like you've worked for nothing
Watch you stand there and tell me getting married is the only way to find stability as a man and how that will help you grow
I can't see you with 3 kids you're raising by yourself because every man who's gotten you pregnant has disappeared and left you with a child you didn't want but love and 2 7 hour jobs to try and make enough to get by
How you think that loyalty is a fable.
Yet you stand there telling me that being a single mother isn't as hard as most people think.
I can't see you with skinned knuckles from bar fights from a temper you can't control. Reciprocating an anger you inherited from a drunk father who came home and beat you and your sister because someone spilt his beer.
How you think it's okay to never apologise.
Yet you stand there saying that fighting won't solve any problems.
I can't see you see how I'm lost from not being able to connect to people. That I sit in corners that are dark and empty so that I cannot face the fact that I've stopped telling anyone anything because I've had enough of my pain being treated like a norm and that I should be able to handle it.
How I can't try to move forward.
Yet I stand here and say that I enjoy our (empty) conversations.
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't do it
I can't keep looking into your eyes and seeing such raw truth hidden behind pretty lies.
It's breaking me
It's breaking all of us
